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Reflections (PG13)
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ATTSS95



: 27.03.2011
: 41
: United Kingdom, England

: 08, 2011 8:55 pm     : Reflections (PG13)

Disclaimer!! I do not own any rights to t.A.T.u. The t.A.T.u. name belongs to the rightful owner (Yulia Volkova since she bought it not too long ago.) And only a couple events actually happened in this story even then, the facts are slightly changed. The rest is all fictional!!

Heyy guys! Well its my first t.A.T.u. fanfic, and well. Most of all, Im just hoping you like it. The story is inspired by the White Robe/Beliy Plaschik video and a few true facts (youll find out later, but it should be obvious what they are).

Oh and there are references to t.A.T.u.s other music videos maybe youll spot them maybe not. But one thing I do hope is that youll enjoy the story. First off though, Im just going to release an introductory part (prologue) and if I get good feedback then Ill start posting the other chapters that Ive wrote XD So yeah enjoy!!


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Prologue

Ironic isnt it? Weve been through so much together... and now it has to end like this. I dont want it to end like this, why would I? After everything, I still love you. After knowing what you did, this feeling wont go. After declaring your love for me, and then betraying me. I dont know why, and I hate you for this, for this stupid feeling that just wont go. I accepted this, thinking that if I went through with it, then Id be over this feeling, but no, just one look in your beautiful blue eyes, the colour of the sea. Your eyes that change different shades of blue depending on your mood. Right now theyre almost grey, you feel dead inside. That ones such an easy one to figure out, you felt like that a lot of times when we were together. Whenever wed argue, and I wouldnt talk to you, your eyes would always change to a near grey colour. And its those eyes that I fall in love with each time...
_________________
16 y/o and cant believe it was so long ago when t.A.T.u first started!!

Check out my new story called Reflections.


: ATTSS95 ( 08, 2011 2:28 pm), 1
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ATTSS95



: 27.03.2011
: 41
: United Kingdom, England

: 18, 2011 9:57 pm     : Chapter 1 - Reminiscing

Hey guys! Well here's the first chapter. Sorry its so short. Anyway, here it goes!! Hope you like it!! Wide smile

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Chapter 1 - Reminiscing

I can clearly picture the time you told me you loved me. We were best friends, and you had told me that you had something you needed to tell me, something urgent.

You had told me Lena, Ive lost my mind and carried on telling me I cannot understand myself... They say its my entire fault, and I swear I did try to forget.

I was confused, you weren't making any sense.

But then you had said Without you, there is no me, I dont want anything but you, its like slow poison, and its making me crazy.

I remember thinking that you had clearly lost your mind. I had thought maybe you had been out in the sun too long again. You did have a habit of sitting out in the sun for long periods of time. You always did like getting a tan. I tried to say something, suggest that you have a rest. You must have read my mind because, before I could start, you began again.

Without you I am not myself. Without you there is no me Lena. May Mama and Papa forgive me for what I feel for you, but its true. Call me crazy, I dont care, ill scream it as loud as I can... YA SOSHLA S UMA!! YA LYUBLYU-

I didnt know why I did what I did at the time; my excuse was to stop you from finishing that sentence. But deep down, I knew I felt the exact same way towards you. I was shocked to say the least... after all I kissed YOU, my best friend... a girl.

I understand why we ran away and stole that truck; I understand that we were madly in love, our parents didnt agree. They tried separating us, but our love was too strong, so we decided to run away with each other.

I remember you telling me Nothing can stop us, not now I love you.

At the age of 15 we ran away. It didnt last long, we were caught. But yet, you took the whole blame, you didnt want me to get a criminal record. Said you kidnapped me because you were deeply in love with me. Thank goodness the police believed me over you. I said that we ran away together. But you were adamant that you stole the truck. I was... no... I am grateful to this very second for what you did; taking the blame - no words can express my gratitude.

We convinced our parents to keep seeing each other, I think they finally realised how much we actually loved each other after that incident. After that, we came out with our secret to everyone, why should we be afraid of who we love? People disliked us, despised us, and hated us. We couldnt care less. We only needed each other, as long as we were together, like you said. Nothing can stop us.

I remember when we were 17, 3 years we had been together, 3 years of pure happiness. You had decided to have your hair cut again. I loved it, the way you would style it different every day, you loved your hair. One day you would make it a Mohawk, the next spikes all over, then the next just flat. You made every single style look amazing. The best part of it was, you only ever let me mess with your hair, you said it was relaxing.

Lets not even get started on your perfect body! No matter how much you ate, youd still maintain that perfectly toned body. You weren't satisfied, you said you had boyish hips, flat breasts and were too skinny. To me, you were perfect. It made you even sexier in my eyes.

I know what its like to have breasts, and let me tell you... they get in the way at times. Id always say to you.

And youd always reply with, Your breasts are perfect, they dont get in the way of things... they make things more... interesting always finishing with a wink.

When we were 18, that's when things started to take a turn for the worst. You always were more outgoing than me, could interact more with others; could speak your mind. You could easily make friends with anyone. Thats when you made friends with Pasha. He introduced you to his other friends, like Sasha, Troy, Sven, Damen... well you get my point. I never did like Pasha, there was something about him, and it was obvious he was interested in you. I tried telling you, many times, but it would always end up in arguing, saying that I should trust your judgement, that I was probably paranoid because he was 23. I guess it annoyed you that much with me telling you. And we ended up breaking up. I was devastated, Im glad that Sasha and Sven were there to help me. God knows what I would have done without them.

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So guys, hope you liked the first chapter. And please review the story. I want to know whether or not its good in peoples views. To the 153 viewers - Thank you for reading the prologue.
Also, for the people who are reading this, im currently revising for exams (My first exam this year is English Literature and To Kill A Mockingbird is something that ive been having to read over and over) which is tiresome. Thank goodness we had the chance to do some exams a year early. Less stress now Wide smile Thank god ive already done English Language and my main subjects Wide smile
Anyway im rambling Craving So im gonna stop writing now Smile Just remember to review! Wide smile

_________________
16 y/o and cant believe it was so long ago when t.A.T.u first started!!

Check out my new story called Reflections.
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ATTSS95



: 27.03.2011
: 41
: United Kingdom, England

: 08, 2011 2:19 pm     : Chapter 2 - A Turn For The Worst.

Well here's the second chapter. I hope you guys like it Smile And like I said in the last chapter. Review! I need to know whether you guys and gals think its good or not Craving Or if your one of them that dont review until later chapters then I suggest going onto Fanfiction.net and reading my chapters on there (Im up to Chapter 5 there) my username on that is Regan4567. But anyway, review! I mean I have 200 odd viewers and no reviews... kinda makes me feel that its crap :/

Chapter 2 - A Turn For The Worst
We couldn't deny the fact that we still loved each other, so, we remained friends. Best friends in fact, I was glad that you still confided in me about everything, we still kissed, that was only natural for us.

I remember, one of the worst days of my life, you told me that you were dating Pasha. My heart nearly ripped in two, I could actually hear a slight crack, the beginning of my heartache. I couldn't believe it; I thought that because we were so close that we would have ended up back together. I acted as if I was happy for you, although you knew better, but decided to play along. It was ok though; I knew it wouldn't last as long as we did, want to know why?

Two reasons really, you still kissed me gently, passionately, with love. I could tell. And then I'd see you kiss Pasha, and I could tell it was forced. He was aggressive in kisses, as if he owned you. The second reason was that (and I know this sounds silly) you still only let me play with your hair. You still thought it was soothing. I was jumping with joy (in my head, I'd look like an idiot in front of everyone) when Pasha touched your hair. You blew up in his face and told him that no one touches your hair. Then started ranting how long it takes, and how you wouldn't want anyone messing up such hard work and perfection.

When I was 19, and you were still 18 (almost 19) you came to me, saying that you didn't know what to do, that I was the only person you could tell this to. I was honoured at first, but then you gave me the biggest shock of my life... you were pregnant. My first thought was that there was no way that you had slept with Pasha willingly. But I knew better.

You had asked me whether you should get an abortion, straight away I had told you to keep the baby. You looked at me with a shocked expression, not knowing what to say. You didn't want to be pregnant, the baby wasn't planned. However, then you told me that the baby might not be Pasha's. I didn't know what to think, all these emotions kept running through my head Happiness because it proved you didn't love Pasha. Anger because I couldn't believe you would cheat on someone. Sadness because I could see that you were upset by this. I asked who else it could be and you replied back that it could be Sergey's.

Sergey was a childhood friend for the both of us, and he would always support us in everything that we did. A year my senior (2 years for you) every girl liked him, he had the looks, he could sing, dance and he had a great personality. I was shocked to say the least, you and Sergey, I mean yeah, when I think about it, you suit. You both have the looks, both could sing and dance, and both had great personalities. It was just... you were too alike, Sergey was basically the male form of you, the only difference being that he had deep chocolate brown eyes instead of your sparkling blue sapphires .

What could I say? I couldn't shout at you, you were pregnant; I knew better than to inflict stress upon you and the baby. So I told you that everything was going to be fine. I suggested that you tell Sergey that he could be the father to your child, see how he would react to the news. It was only right Pasha knew too, after all, it was possible that he could be the father as well. Everything was too complicated.

Surprisingly, Sergey took it well considering you weren't in a relationship with him. He had told you that if he is the father, when they found out after the baby was born, and then he'd do whatever he could to provide for the child; and, if you had wanted, he would be a dad to the child as well. I remember his exact words.

"Yulia, anyone can be a father, but it takes someone who cares to be a dad. So I'll be there for the child, unless of course you don't want me to. If that's the case I'll still support you and the child."

You were shocked to say the least, but oh so happy at the same time. Now it was Pasha's turn.

On the other hand, Pasha had took it badly, hardly surprising really, you had only told him that you were pregnant (you couldn't mention the fact that he might not be the father) and straight away he had suggested abortion. He told you that you had too much to lose by having a child, as did he. He made up excuses as to why you shouldn't have the baby. Financial reasons, responsibility, the lack of free time, hard work, the lost freedom; the excuses were endless! I had my suspicions though; it seemed strange that he had the reasons mapped out already. However, I pushed it to the back of my mind. Like you had said before, I needed to trust your judgement.

Then once again the arguments began and after what seemed like hours of constant quarrelling, I could see that you were getting stressed. I should have got involved straight away; I suppose I just wanted to see what would happen. And now, I could tell, you were going to blow at any minute. I got involved, told you to wait outside whilst I dealt with situation. The second you closed that door I had slapped him across the face. I called him a bastard for impregnating you, it was then that the rage began I was seething.

I told him he wasn't worthy of dating someone like you and how if I'd have been in his shoes that I'd have been delighted that you were carrying my child. I told him that if I were dating you that I would be the best possible partner, not only to fulfil your needs but to show love and compassion towards the person who meant absolutely everything to me.

One hour. That's how long this feud had lasted. Comments bouncing back and forth to and from each other, voices rising. It was then he had told me something that had crushed my heart. He told me that you never loved me, that I was just a stage, an experiment, a thing to pass the time with. My initial thought was to hit him and tell him how wrong he was. After that, I stormed out the room left the house; it was all too much for me.

You were sat on the couch, watching TV and after spotting me walking down the hallway; you jumped up and smiled at me. I was momentarily swooned by that dazzling smile, I mean, who wouldn't be? Perfect straight teeth, white as snow which, in a certain light glowed. But just as quick as I was swooned, I was just as quickly overtaken with fury. I remember telling you to 'Fuck off'.

I said I never wanted to see you again, I was kidding myself by saying that, rage does strange things to you, makes you say things that aren't actually true. My heart was already broken by the news, and seeing your face drop after momentarily confused broke it even more. I couldn't stand to see you that upset. But why were you hurt by what I had said? After all, I was just a stage, an experiment, a thing to pass the time.

You never actually loved me; you played me, just like you played many others before me.

It made sense I suppose, that you never loved me I mean. That I was just a stage, it explained why you always got annoyed at me during our early days of being 18. You must have been sick of my presence constantly. It wasn't my fault, even though you never loved me, I loved you with all my heart and soul. Nothing could change that... it still can't. That day was one of the hardest things I've had to do in my life. I had sworn to myself that I would never fall in love again.

I had walked out of your life; you tried getting in contact with me several times. You had phoned my house and mobile phone several times each day, you came to my house on numerous occasions. Each time it got harder and harder to avoid you. So I done the only thing I could... I moved. It wasn't easy for me to move, it was a costly process and then I had to change my number to make sure you didn't call.

I remember that my Mama had phoned to see how I was doing, it was a cheerful chat, such a nice feeling to hear a reassuring voice; well at least it was until she had told me that you had visited the house. Apparently Sasha had told you that I had moved.

My first reaction was happiness, maybe you still cared after all? But then I remembered you loved attention, always have, always will. And who better than to lather you with attention than someone who loves you with all their heart? I was glad that my Mama didn't tell you where I moved to. It would save the stress of having to see you again.


Well there it is. Hope you liked it and like I said... REVIEW! Wide smile Want to know what you all think.
_________________
16 y/o and cant believe it was so long ago when t.A.T.u first started!!

Check out my new story called Reflections.
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: 17.08.2009
: 6055
: AFE zone :)

: 08, 2011 3:02 pm     :

It is well written and at least good if not better than that

This place is mainly death ... 250+ views and one comment is kinda super here Smile

But keep on writing ... at least I like it Smile
_________________
Give me mouth full of your hate - Before we can copulate
Give me mouth full of your taste - Before we can make human waste





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ATTSS95



: 27.03.2011
: 41
: United Kingdom, England

: 08, 2011 3:04 pm     :

():
It is well written and at least good if not better than that

This place is mainly death ... 250+ views and one comment is kinda super here Smile

But keep on writing ... at least I like it Smile


Thanks! And Really? Wow... I thought you would get quite a few reviews or something. I was starting to think it was crap XD

Thanks though! I'll update it more often now Smile
_________________
16 y/o and cant believe it was so long ago when t.A.T.u first started!!

Check out my new story called Reflections.
   Yahoo Messenger MSN Messenger
ATTSS95



: 27.03.2011
: 41
: United Kingdom, England

: 12, 2011 7:21 pm     :

Chapter 3 - Our First Meeting.

I knew that if you were ever to find out where I lived, and I knew that you would at some point; then you would be convincing me to talk to you again. After realising how hard it was to avoid you before, there was no doubt in my mind that I would, without a shadow of a doubt, return happily into your life. I'd have given literally anything to see your exquisite genuine smile that was only ever seen on rare occasions. It was hard to distinguish your fake smile from your genuine one. You were great at acting, always wanted to become famous. You even had that short amount of time where you were. Well we both were, but you were more popular than me. It's typical the way we met actually, both in Neposedi at the time. We clicked instantly... Well not instantly but it didn't take too long.

I was the new kid, it was only natural for me to be teased as the newbie of the group; but you didn't join in with the mockery, you were always more sympathetic than the others. You told me about your struggles with being new, how you were considered to be the 'odd one out'. You empathised with my situation, you told me to keep my head up and not retort to the teasing. Astonishingly, you, Yulia Volkova, one of the most popular members of Neposedi, actually understood a boring, dull redhead.

After your protection from the teasers, no one would dare talk about me in the wrong way. After all, who would dare mess with the great Yulia Volkova? We were inseparable, always by each other's side. We always said we loved each other, back then we loved each other as best friends. But our love was so strong, people never knew what to think, whether we were just best friends who loved each other dearly. Or something more?

I remember the day when you introduced me to Sergey, he didn't come to the band everyday like us, he was older, so he was put in another part of the group. I have to admit, your facial expression indicated total shock when you realised that we were already friends. I remember his exact words when he saw me there, he pretended to look shocked and stunned by my appearance, but he was just a big joker at heart. His words still echo around my mind.

"Lena? You're the new smokin' red head everyone's been talking about? Well this is a downer... I was hoping to meet a new chick."

To which I would reply "Idiot, I bet you don't even care that I'm second soprano, same as Yulia here."

We had told you that we had met when I was 6, he had just turned 7. We had the same piano teacher, and, unfortunately for me, I had to wait outside until the previous student was finished with his/her lesson. Sergey explained further that he was the one in the room, he was having difficulties learning a Beethoven piece, and he couldn't seem to figure it out no matter how hard he tried. I continued to explain that I was getting awfully impatient. After all, waiting outside for over thirty minutes is quite monotonous. Sergey carried on.

"Yeah and the next thing I know, I get a little six year old red head slamming the door open demanding that she have her lesson now or else she would tell her parents to forget the extra money that was to be given to the teacher."

You looked at me, eyes filled with amusement as my face almost turned to the colour of my hair.

"Aww who would have thought that the shy Lena we all know is bossy? I guess it's true what they say about red heads, eh Sergey?" Was your reply with a wholehearted laugh to go accompany it.


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A/N

I only really expected this story to be a one-shot at first Funny how things turn out huh? Craving

But its waaaay to long to be a one-shot. So yeah here I am making a story out of it. So anyway, so far I hope you guys are enjoying it. And be sure to review, I honestly would really appreciate it if you did. Would mean I knew how many were reading it then Craving Even if its bad reviews, I honestly don't mind. Would mean whether or not I knew if the story was a load of crap or not XD

Also, before I forget. I'm sorry if you think the chapters are too short. But on my document it actually looks somewhat the right amount of pages for a story. But then uploading it here just makes it look smaller XD So yeah, sorry if you think the chapter are too short, but I hope you enjoy the story nevertheless Wide smile

Oh! Almost forgot! Another reason why I haven't updated this is because, well, I have exams in high school right now. So I'm trying to balance everything out. So sorry if my updates are late. But I really want to get good grades in my subjects (Especially Science - seem to be doing crap in that right now)

_________________
16 y/o and cant believe it was so long ago when t.A.T.u first started!!

Check out my new story called Reflections.
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ATTSS95



: 27.03.2011
: 41
: United Kingdom, England

: 13, 2011 7:44 pm     : Chapter 4 - Meeting New Friends.

Well heres the next chapter. I actually have quite alot of chapters written. But I always look back on them and edit and add things or take things off. Plus like I said in the last chapter, I have my exams this month so im revising like crazy XD And because of that, I havent really been able to add to my story. (Plus the fact im writing a story somewhat based on real life -a seperate one.) So things are kind of hectic right now. Luckily though, because im ill i get to stay off school. So I have alot of more time now. Im only going in for exams now Smile So updates might be a bit more frequent.

Anyway, yet again... the chapter doesn't seem that long. But it does actually seem longer on my documents.


Chapter 4 - Meeting New Friends.

It had been two months. Two long, miserable months without seeing you. The first month was extremely painful, why wouldn't it be? Knowing that the person I loved used me; took me for a complete and utter fool. Coming to grips with it all was extremely painful; luckily Mama had visited frequently to help me through everything. Even Papa came to visit... although that ended up in a huge argument.

"I told you that loving that... thing... was a huge mistake, but would you listen? No. And now look at you, you're a wreck. Why did you even fall for her Elena? She was a bad choice of friend to begin with."

That had done it for me. All these suppressed feelings that I had tried to keep inside, they all just... came out. And unfortunately for me, it was towards my Papa... protecting you.

"Yulia is NOT a thing! How fucking dare you! She's human like all of us, and it isn't her fault if her feelings towards me had changed! You of all people should understand that Papa! Your feelings changed towards Mama. I fell for her because she was the best thing that had happened to me! Even you can't deny the fact that she helped me to gain confidence! You can call her all you want for breaking my heart, but never, and I mean never, say that she was a bad choice of friend!"

The next thing I remember, I felt a sting on my left cheek which increasingly converted into a burning sensation. He had hit me across the face. I know he hadn't meant to, I could see it in his eyes that he regretted what he did. It was, I suppose a natural reaction after hearing such verbal comments escape my lips. He was about to apologise but I had beaten him to it

"Get out... Now... Get out of my house... I forgive you, but... leave, I don't want to see you right now."

Luckily he complied; he walked out with his shoulders hunched and his head shamefully hung. As he got to the front door he turned around looked at me and apologised deeply. That was the last I would see of my Papa again for another two years.

During that small episode, I had decided that, although I could sit around all day and go into a deep depressive state, I had to go out, make new friends. Who knows? Maybe they could be the first step to getting my life back on track.

Three weeks had passed since then and I had made quite a few new friends. Two that stuck out the most however, was Svetlana and Andrei. They were great friends in such a short amount of time; we had a lot in common. Andrei was studying to become a psychologist, just like I had wanted to do. He was surprised when he realised how much I actually knew when it came to the psychological studies.

How couldn't I be good at it? You were my best friend, I knew you in and out. I knew when you were hiding what you really felt, and I knew how to calm you down, which if I may say, was a daunting task in itself. You would be perfect for a psychology class, I bet each one would fail; you aren't exactly the easiest person to read.

Svetlana on the other hand was the complete opposite of Andrei. She was more focused on becoming famous. But she was down to Earth, and knew not to think lowly of others. We had the same personality, although she was more confident than me.

Andrei was your typical pretty boy Blonde hair, blue eyes, perfect jaw line, tanned perfectly. I wasn't surprised that he could get almost any girl he wanted. After all, his sense of style was great, and he was tall. Tall and handsome, a definite plus with women. We don't exactly want someone that's shorter than us now do we? He did have one flaw past everything perfect though. That was the fact that he was a major player. Don't get me wrong, he had a great personality. But he loved women too much, and the fact he couldn't stick with one made it even worse.

Svetlana however, was yet again the complete opposite Black hair, green eyes, oval shaped face, and quite pale. She had a slim figure and had an expensive sense of style. She was taller than me (although it really isn't that hard to be) and was determined to get to the top. In the short amount of time that I had known her, I already looked up to her. The determination that she held inside of her was definitely something to admire. No matter how many times she got neglected she would always shrug it off and try again. I knew that one day she would make it.

Another week had passed and Andrei and Svetlana had really helped me forget about everything that had happened. That is, of course, until we had met again. It was February 14th and snow covered the streets of Moscow, not surprising to say the least, snow didn't stop here until March. Six days to go until your birthday, I had thought that I needed to go out and get you a present. My old present was something that screamed out 'I love you with all my heart' and I didn't want you thinking that you could easily find me and bring me back. So I had gone to a few jewellery shops to get you a bracelet. I would have gotten you a ring, but I remembered that you already wore quite a few. And I knew what type of bracelets you liked. I guess it was silly of me to think you wouldn't be in GUM; after all it is your favourite shopping place. You always did like expensive things.

I was in one of the jewellery shops and I had heard someone say "Come on Yulia, I've already told you, I'll get you any ring you want, you can even get the most expensive one if you want."

I didn't really pay much attention; after all, how many people in Moscow alone have the name Yulia? So I carried on looking for the right type of bracelet to buy you. One had already caught my eye, although it could have a double meaning. It wasn't expensive, but it wasn't exactly cheap either. It was silver and had a single charm with it, that charm was half a heart, in some ways, it was perfect. After all you had broken my heart, and that charm did have the broken line where it cut off. I guess though, considering that it only was half a heart, it shown that a part of my heart would always belong to you. Nothing would be able to change that. So as a result, I decided to buy it. The jeweller had told me that it came in a pack of two, and that the other chain was the other half of the heart. I had decided that it was perfect, I liked the chain myself and, at least then, I knew that metaphorically, a piece of my heart would always be with you whilst the rest was safely with me. After buying the chains and packing it in the bag, I had decided to take a quick look around the shop one more time. I always was a sucker for nice jewellery. After a quick last look I had decided to head back out to get something to eat, and that was when, I had gotten to see you once more. I didn't notice you at all; after all, I was on my phone texting Svetlana to meet up with me. I didn't exactly want to eat on my own.

So yeah, heres the 4th Chapter. So I hope you all like it. And I cant stress enough how much I want people to review. Its my first story, and I want to know what I can improve. Or maybe just scrap the thing all together. I really appreciated the review from and it made me post these up. It only takes about 5 minutes tops to make a review. And guess what? For the amount of time I spend writing a chapter it would be highly appreciated.
_________________
16 y/o and cant believe it was so long ago when t.A.T.u first started!!

Check out my new story called Reflections.
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: 17.08.2009
: 6055
: AFE zone :)

: 13, 2011 8:08 pm     :

I really like this fanfic ... Smile

But as I said this place is rather dead ....

If you keep on posting , I keep on reading ... but if you do not want to post it just for me , I understand Smile

I really am not the right person to say what to improve ... as I believe that artists should make what they feel (and how they feel) this far I have liked it a lot Smile
_________________
Give me mouth full of your hate - Before we can copulate
Give me mouth full of your taste - Before we can make human waste





Pink sigi by Ira Smile
     AIM Address Yahoo Messenger
ATTSS95



: 27.03.2011
: 41
: United Kingdom, England

: 13, 2011 8:13 pm     :

():
I really like this fanfic ... Smile

But as I said this place is rather dead ....

If you keep on posting , I keep on reading ... but if you do not want to post it just for me , I understand Smile

I really am not the right person to say what to improve ... as I believe that artists should make what they feel (and how they feel) this far I have liked it a lot Smile


Thanks! Like I said, its really appreciated. I'll keep posting, just keep reviewing, that way I'll actually know your reading it Smile I dont mind as much if I get a review. And I dont mind writing for one person. Mr. Green
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: 17.08.2009
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: 13, 2011 8:15 pm     :

Ok ... I keep on reviewing then Smile
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: 27.03.2011
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: 14, 2011 4:22 pm     :

Chapter 5 - Reunion

I had just gotten out of the shop and was about to make my way to Starbucks when I heard someone shout my name. The next thing I knew I had turned round to see you with a huge smile on your face, and from what I could see, water building up in your eyes.

"Lena! Your here! Your actually here! I can't believe it, I missed you so much!"

I couldn't reply, I wanted to, so much, but my mind couldn't produce any words to come out of my mouth. I had thought that if I had met you again, then talking to you would be easy. Right now though, my thoughts were on how much you hadn't really changed. You still had your figure, which temporarily made me think you had an abortion, but having a closer look, you could see the beginning of a baby bump forming. And your hair had grown longer, not immensely; it had only grown about two, maybe three inches. The most noticeable change - for me that is, was your eyes. Usually they were a sparkling sapphire blue. But now, they were nearly grey, dull, no life. You were unhappy, I couldn't help but think of whether me moving was the reason of your unhappiness.

"Lena... please... please, talk to me. I want you back in my life, whatever I have done, I am truly sorry. You're my best friend Lena, I love you so much... please... just talk to me."

I couldn't believe what I was hearing, seriously, you didn't know what you had done? I thought it would be fairly obvious after all; you were the one who told Pasha everything.

"How dare you think you can just come up to me and act as if nothing's wrong. And then have the cheek to say that you're sorry! And you don't even know what you're sorry for!"

Your expression, to say the least, was one ridden with pure shock. I had never raised my voice at you this loud, and I could clearly tell that you were confused.

"Lena... honestly... I have no idea what you are talking about. For nearly three months I've been trying to figure out what I've done wrong." You had your head hung down and that was it. That was the first time I had ever seen you cry. Well obviously I had seen you cry from laughter, but that was it. This was the first time I had ever seen you cry over anything else that wasn't to do with joy. And my heart couldn't help but melt at the sight of it. I had to keep strong though, I couldn't let you win.

"I think you do, after all you're the one who told that bastard over there everything." I had pointed over to Pasha who was standing at the jewellery shop window and was quietly looking in this direction at the scene that was unfolding in front of him.

"Wh... what are you talking about? I didn't disclose much about us to Pasha."

I couldn't tell whether you were telling the truth or not, your head kept facing the floor after you had said something, and I had never been in this situation before. You had never cried like this in front of me. Maybe it was the pregnancy, after all it would enhance your emotions and cause mood swings. I was expecting for you to lash out next if that was the case.

"Well, why don't you ask him, since you seem to have forgotten everything?"

Straight away you had called him over seeming quite angry all of a sudden. I myself was getting angrier by the minute, not only would I be late for meeting Svetlana but now I had to face Pasha again.

"Lena... I would say it was nice to see you again... But after you made Yulia this miserable, I'd be lying to say that."

I had noticed that you had given him a slight kick to his ankle, a signal that told him to be nice.

"Well, Pasha, why would she be miserable with me gone? If I was Yulia, after what you had told me, I'd be happy that I had gone and I could carry on with my life."

By now I had looked over to you, you were eyeing up Pasha suspiciously wondering what I had meant by all this. Pasha's eyes had widened, I guess he thought the reason you called him over was to support you and take you home, he definitely wasn't expecting this.

"Pasha What the fuck is Lena talking about?" You had turned your head to him now, curiosity and anger clearly showing.

"Well err Well she's the one who moved. Yulia, she left you, how am I supposed to know? For all you know she could be lying to you."

I was appalled to say the least, how dare he accuse me of lying! He had a smug smirk across his face as he seen you contemplating his answer. I was about to retort with what he had told you, but you had already beaten me to it, by giving him a slap across the face.

"Who the fuck do you think you are! I've known Lena since I was eleven! Don't you think that I would know if she was lying by now! Now what did you fucking say to her!" We were both shocked; Pasha was more shocked that you actually hit him. I was more shocked that you were defending me.

What you had just did, plus you raising voice, had gathered a crowd. I could see that people were whispering and I was slowly getting more embarrassed by the second. I never was good with people whispering about me. Pasha had kept quiet; I think he was just as embarrassed that his girlfriend was shouting at him in a public place like this. After all, it was GUM; everyone went there at one point or another.

"Fucking hell Pasha! What the fuck did you say to Lena to make her walk out of my life like that! It isn't that hard a question to answer!"

His head had snapped up with a smile across his face, I knew something bad was going to happen. "She still loved you when you told her you know. She's never stopped loving you; you've wanted to know what she said the day she left, well it's your lucky day Yulia. I'll tell you."

I looked in your direction to see you already looking directly at me. Although I didn't say a word, you knew exactly what I wanted you to do.

"Pasha don't you fucking dare tell me. That choice is up to Lena to tell me what she said that day. Anyway, I have a strong hunch the reason she left isn't because of what she had told you. Now then I'm going to ask you one last time nicely." You had taken a deep breath and closed your eyes briefly to try and calm yourself down before looking back at Pasha and begin speaking again.

"Now tell me Pasha What the fuck did you tell Lena?" Annoyance could be clearly heard in your voice, and it was obvious Pasha could detect that annoyance as well. as he had started to rub his hands together involuntarily.

"Well errm. You see I may have told her that ahem that you that you never errm loved her" I could see your eyes widen and straight away you looked over to me for the confirmation of truth, I had nodded my head slowly and you looked back at Pasha.

"You bastard" I could barely make out what you had said, it was a near whisper after all.

"You fucking bastard! How dare you tell her that! You know! You know how much I fucking love her! How could you even sleep next to me at night when I was depressed! You son of a bitch!"

I was temporarily paralysed, I wasn't sure if I had heard you right, thoughts kept running through my head. 'Did I hear her right? Did she really say she loves me?' 'No, no I'm going crazy.'I snapped out of it when I glanced back over to you, you were infuriated. I had to step in, try and calm you down, after all, you were pregnant. I had placed my right hand on your right shoulder and placed my other hand in your left.

"Yulia come on, it isn't worth stressing over-"

"Isn't worth stressing over? He fucking told you a complete lie which made you move. Why wouldn't I stress over this Lena?" Your voice had settled, but I could tell you were still annoyed. You were still tense, a sure sign that you needed to be calmed down. So, with my hand in yours, I traced circles in the palm of your hand. It was natural for me, after all, we had been together since we were fourteen. I knew how to relax you easily. Sure enough you started to relax, your breathing became more regular and your grip on my hand had loosened ever so slightly.

"Come on Yulia, you can come eat with me if you want, we can catch up on things." I'd said it quietly, loud enough for you to hear. But only you. You had turned round and gave me one of your genuine smiles. It seemed I had forgotten how beautiful your smile actually was, as I was temporarily stunned once again.

"I'd love that, can we go somewhere that sells pickles and ice-cream? It seems to be my favourite at the minute it's all I've been craving." I couldn't help but laugh at your reply, as disgusting as it sounded, the look on your face was that of pure innocence. It reminded me of whenever you'd want ice-cream when we'd go out. You would start jumping up and down like a little child begging me to buy you some 'icy goodness.'

"Well, I promised a friend I'd meet up with her now at Starbucks. So we'll have to go there first. But afterwards we can go to the shop and I'll buy you some ice-cream and pickles ok?" Your facial expression had lightened up, and your smile had grew into a full blown toothy grin. Yet again I couldn't help but laugh at you, you were bouncing on your tiptoes, and your hands were waving around excitedly.

"Yay! Ice-cream! Ice-cream! Gonna get me some ice-cream!" You had sung aloud. I was quickly getting embarrassed, even though many of the people had left after you had settled down, there were still many that lurked around in case of another overblown argument.

"Yulia! Stop it! Your embarrassing me!" My face had gone red with embarrassment, and you had quickly noticed.

"Aww poor Lenka, good to know that I can still embarrass you so easily huh?" You smiled even more if that was possible and you draped your arm around my shoulder. I froze momentarily, you still had that special touch that would send shivers up my spine. I wasn't sure if you had noticed, because you were laughing quite loudly. I had noticed a few things though, you had definitely lightened up as you were no longer tensed. The thing that mostly stood out though, was that your eyes had gained a slight sparkle, and that was when my worries slowly started to fade away.

Hoped you liked it! And just a heads up... Im writing another story aswell. The song Stars inspired me somewhat... though I completely changed the meaning of the song in it Dance I have no idea why... but it just started going along with it. I have no idea what I am going to call it yet... it'll come to me... eventually Rolling Eyes But when I do upload it up and such, I'll let you know and I'll post the link in my signiture Smile
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: 17.08.2009
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: 14, 2011 4:30 pm     :

I could picture all that in my mind ... well written Smile
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: 27.03.2011
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: 14, 2011 4:49 pm     :

():
I could picture all that in my mind ... well written Smile


Thanks! Wide smile I actually thought this was one of my worst chapters Confused Im glad that you thought that though Wide smile
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: 14, 2011 5:56 pm     : Chapter 6

Arent you guys lucky? I posted this up before I did on the other website XD I thought that maybe I should start posting them up here first... Because, after all, this is t.A.T.u. fanfiction. So it's only natural that it should be posted on here first right?

Well anyway, here it is. Chapter 6! Hope you enjoy it! And I had actually only just came up with the title Smile Its not a very good one... but what can I do? I wanted to post it up. And I had realised that there was no title... How great am I? Oh well, what can you do eh? Pardon


Chapter 6 - What happens now?

We had completely forgotten about Pasha, and after your laughter had subsided, you had seemed to remember about him quickly. We looked over to where he previously was when we were arguing with him, and to our curiosity, he had vanished. We scanned the area around us from where we stood, and we both caught a brief look of him exiting the building.

Well thats one less thing to worry about, huh Lenka? You had linked your arm with mine with a smile on your face.

Errm yeah, look Yulia I need to talk to you later, its really important. I had said with a serious tone well I tried to make it sound serious, if I did though? That was an entirely different thing.

Your smile had faded, talking things over that were important were never good with you. But you regained your smile quickly and looked at me again.

Sure now to Starbucks! Im starving! You had began dragging me to Starbucks, and I couldnt help but laugh at your eagerness to get there.

Ok, Ok! Just stop dragging me! Im already late anyway, an extra five minutes wont do any difference

Oh, sorry, Im just really hungry. Remember I have two to feed now.

You had smiled at me yet again and this time I couldnt help but return the smile. I had realised that you had won, yet again.

You know Lena I really missed you, Im really glad I seen you today.

Dont be offended by this Yulia, after all its the last Id want you to be. But did you miss me because of the lack of attention?

Your facial expression clearly shown that you were offended, but it had changed to a smile quickly. And you had responded to my question.

I cant exactly not be offended by that. But I understand why youd ask that. I admit, I do miss the attention you would give me. However, that is nothing compared to how much I missed YOU. Not the attention but you altogether. When you first left, I believed that you would come back in a week. I thought it was because of the argument with Pasha but then after that week, I started getting nervous. After all, we have never stayed away from each other that long and lets face it, without you, there is no me. I missed that perfect smile of yours. I missed counting the freckles on your face, I missed looking into those emerald eyes. I missed playing with your hair. I missed those quiet times together when we took turns on laying our heads on each others laps and playing with each others hair. But most of all most of all I missed being able to love you Lena.

You had looked at me and smiled your perfect smile. And I couldnt help but stare. The emotions that I had pushed away for the two months had came back full force. You kept looking at me and I couldnt help but notice that your smile hadnt yet disappeared from your face. Your genuine smile that told that you were at ease.

Sorry, I didnt mean to make you feel awkward its just it is how I felt and every day I thought of you at least once.

You looked back in front of you and unlinked your arm from mine. The smile on your face had slightly less meaning. My guess was that you felt awkward from the silence. You didnt like a quiet conversation.
It didnt make me feel awkward. Its okay. I was just thinking of a few things thats all. And how to reply to that

You looked back at me again and nodded you head understanding somewhat. Your eyes told that you were slightly confused. Usually I would reply nearly instantly to you. So I guess it would be somewhat confusing that I was thinking over what you had said.

Yulia A reason why I was so angry the day I last saw you-

Lena, you dont have to tell me now if you dont want to. I dont want you thinking that you need to tell me now. Ill wait until your sure you want to tell me.

You looked at me again and smiled. I couldnt help but smile back and think how thoughtful you were being.

Thank you but I really need to know this. And its something Ive wanted to know the whole time Ive been away.

You nodded your head again and looked in front to see if Starbucks was in sight.

Well, when myself and Pasha argued yes he told me that you didnt love me but you see, that wouldnt have hit me so hard. Because if he had just said that, then I would have known he had been lying. After all, four years together is a long time. You wouldnt date someone for that amount of time if you didnt love them, right?

Thats absolutely right. I love you with all my heart, and my past relationships prove that I dont stick around with someone long if I dont love them.

Exactly so li-

So wait, if it isnt that that made you not want to talk to me this long what did he say?

You looked at me curiously, and waited for my answer, before yet again looking in front of you.

Well He had told me that I was just an experiment, a thing to pass the time with.

Your head quickly snapped round to face me looking quite angry all of a sudden.

He told you that you was just a thing to pass the time with and you believed him!? You just contradicted that a second ago. So how could that affect you?

It wasnt that as much that affected me, it was the experiment thing. That just added onto it.

You looked down at the floor with a frown on your face and your hands had formed into fists. It was because of those simple actions that I couldnt help but be suspicious.

Yulia did you tell him that?

You looked up at me before looking back down. Repeating the process another two times before finally looking back up at me.

Lena Im so sorry

So its true. What he said was partly true then?

I couldnt believe that you had told him that, and my heart had earned another crack. How many more would it take before it shattered?

Lena listen please before you assume that you was an experiment the whole time. Because I genuinely do love you with all my heart. Ive loved you for years. Even before we had actually started dating we loved each other dearly.

I looked down contemplating to let you continue, and you seemed to realise that, so you didnt speak letting me think it over. I looked up to make sure I wouldnt bump into anyone, and - in my line of sight I noticed that just a few stores down was Starbucks.

Oh, theres Starbucks. Look Yulia, Ill let you explain later, but youll always be my best friend, nothing can change that.

You looked at me with a smile that turned into a full blown toothy grin. And you quickly gave me a hug to which I returned with a kiss to your cheek.

Thank you Lena

I had placed my hand in yours and you looked at me smiling gently at me.

Dont mention it. Youll probably hear a lot off Svetlana now anyway.

So yeah... hoped you liked it Wide smile Ive just thought... this is probably the shortest A/N ive written at the end of the chapter XD
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: 14, 2011 6:26 pm     :

ATTSS95 ():


Thanks! Wide smile I actually thought this was one of my worst chapters Confused Im glad that you thought that though Wide smile


I liked the pace of that ... it was bit like reading a tennis game , I like that kind of things

New chapter is also very good Smile
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Give me mouth full of your hate - Before we can copulate
Give me mouth full of your taste - Before we can make human waste





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: 27.03.2011
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: 15, 2011 12:20 am     :

():
ATTSS95 ():


Thanks! Wide smile I actually thought this was one of my worst chapters Confused Im glad that you thought that though Wide smile


I liked the pace of that ... it was bit like reading a tennis game , I like that kind of things

New chapter is also very good Smile


Hehe, I didnt really expect it to turn out like that. But either way im glad you like it Smile
And thanks Smile
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: 27.03.2011
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: 15, 2011 10:45 pm     :

Well! This is probably the longest chapter I have EVER written! It took me a week and 3 days to write this! I kept getting distracted and my exams were here and all that sort of stuff. Ive decided that if you like long chapters like this, then I'll try and do it more often. And the fact that I have to listen to t.A.T.u. songs whilst writing this made it more difficult because I had temporarily lost my CDs and my internet was out majority of today. But I had gotten it working and I was adament that I was going to post this up today! And lucky me! I have 18 minutes before its tomorrow Mr. Green Anyway, I hope you like the chapter!

Chapter 7 - Some Explaining To Do

Meeting Svetlana wasnt exactly what I had expected. It wasnt really what you had expected either. At first she was suspicious, after all, I had told her the whole story about us, so she kept a close eye on you for about fifteen minutes. But when she realised how well we was getting along and the fact that it was the most she had ever seen me smile. She quickly warmed up to you.

Yuls I can call you Yuls right Yulia? Svetlana had somewhat asked.

Sure, if I can call you Lana? You had asked with a laugh to go along with it.

Lana? Why Lana? It doesnt even sound Russian.

Exactly, makes you different then, well should I say it makes you stand out.

Svetlana looked at us both and I could tell what she was going to ask next.

Yuls are you trying to flirt with me? Cause I dont roll that way

Your facial expression was something to laugh at as your eyes had widened tremendously and you had started choking on your coffee. As a reflex I quickly started patting your back whilst laughing. When you had regained your demure composure you gave me a quick look that told me to stop laughing. Although that just made me laugh even more.

Definitely not! I dont even roll that way! I said that because most of my friends stand out.

Ohh Wait you obviously do roll that way if you dated Lena

As if timed we both sighed at the exact same time. How many times did we have to explain to people before they realised?

How do you do that? Thats creepy!

Svetlana pointed towards the both of us with big eyes obviously freaked out by the sigh. Which in turn gained a laugh from the two of us at the same time yet again.

Seriously stop it! Its creepy!

Sorry, its something thats always happened ever since we were eleven.

I had replied with another laugh to accompany it whilst you had tried to contain your laughter by placing your head on the table.

Anyway care to explain?

She looked towards the both of us well mainly you, as you hadnt yet stopped laughing quietly with your head placed on the table.

Errm Lena Is she alright?

Svetlana was eyeing you curiously whilst asking me the question and it was the typical look most people would give you when you were like this over something so little Is she crazy?

Shes fine She gets like this at times. She should get over it soon.

I briefly looked over towards you again and noticed that you were in fact calming down. I looked back over to Svetlana to see her still eyeing you before she shrugged and took another drink of her coffee. We were silent taking sips of our coffee waiting for you to calm down. It didnt take too long, possibly three minutes, shorter than what it usually took. After you composed yourself, we began to explain.

Do you know how many times weve had to explain this to people? Its like a script memorised in our heads now. We always know exactly what to say. Because its always the same questions that are asked.

I had began with that and you had placed you hand in mine entwining our fingers. I looked towards you and you gave me a smile to which I returned.

Sorry its just, usually if you have dated both genders then that tends to mean you roll both ways.

We havent dated both genders its a complicated thing Lana, you either understand it or you dont. Its as simple as that. You had finished what you were saying and took a sip of your coffee and placed it back on the table before looking back at Svetlana whilst she was talking.

I see Well let me at least try to understand then, carry on.

I looked towards you to signal that you should carry on.

Well Lana, you see, in most peoples eyes, we are labelled as bi-sexual or lesbians. People dont listen to what we have to say. They just assume. Anyway, we arent bi-sexual and we definitely are not lesbian. We both like guys, we always have, always will. Its just.. our love for each other was stronger than anything you can imagine. When we first became friends we were closer than most people would be. We were best friends straight away, and within a month we were sleeping at each others houses. By the next year we were so close people were confused somewhat by our relationship. They knew we were best friends, but we were that close, even the supervisors at Neposedi were suspicious-

NEPOSEDI! You were in Neposedi! Lena why didnt you ever tell me that!?

Well you know how I am Plus you never asked.

You looked at me then towards Svetlana examining our faces. Mine was that of embarrassment whilst Svetlanas was indescribable. Her eyes were wide and he mouth kept opening and closing. I think she was a mixture of a few emotions right then. I could definitely see the shock on her face, and slight anger. Probably from not telling her about it. There were definitely a few others there, but at that point in time I was more focused in calming her down.

You never told her about Neposedi? Thats like one of the biggest things in any ones life. You said, a smile on your face. My guess was that you were trying not to laugh at Svetlanas reaction.

Well, I want people liking me for who I am Yulia, you know how I am with that kind of stuff. And if she had asked - I would have gladly told her.

You gently squeezed my hand and looked back over towards Svetlana. Looking over myself I seen that Svetlana still had the mixed expression on her face and was somewhat contemplating on what to say next. I started getting nervous, I knew how badly she wanted to become famous someday. And not telling her about my past was something that I knew I would eventually regret. That time, unfortunately for me, was right now. Everybody has heard the saying Its better sooner than later right? Well let me tell you, its a lie. Sadly I was hoping that that time would be later. To my dismay - it wasnt. The fact was, it was now I was regretting not telling, it was now that I would have to explain everything. And it was now that I would probably be trying my hardest to get Svetlana to speak to me again.

I cant believe you didnt tell me this Lena, you know how badly I want to be famous. And you obviously know people that would help me become famous. But yet, you decided to keep that from me. Why? Why would you do that? Youve seen me get refused, seen me upset over it. Svetlana had said, an expression between anger and sadness hung on her face.

Svetlana Im sorry But I like people liking me for just me, not for what I can do or that I was in Neposedi when I was younger. When I was in Neposedi you couldnt trust anyone, you had to keep yourself guarded because you would easily get exposed. And the people there were nice but they were either stuck up or just bitchy. A few people were rebellious though. I didnt tend to like them

Hey! I was rebellious! Didnt you like me? Yulia had interrupted. Making myself and Svetlana turn to look at her. What? What did I say wrong? Im asking a genuine question. I gave her a questioning glance whilst in my peripheral vision I could see Svetlana giving a what the fuck look directed at you. You looked towards us both and started grumbling whilst moving your hands about.

Fine, I wont say anything next time someone takes a dig at me. Ill just let them offend me a bit. Doesnt matter, being genuinely curious doesnt seem to matter anymore in this day and age. Seems that the younger you are now-a-days the less respectful you are of other peoples curiosities, but like I said, it doesnt matter. Because its now apparent that Im not important.
I looked on at you in amusement, and I could see a smile beginning to form on Svetlana as well.

Yulia your younger than me. It would mean that your more disrespectful than me Actually, you are WAY more disrespectful than me.

You looked at me with a grin on your face and I could notice the little glint in your eyes.

Thats true, but Im not going to have someone look or talk to me in a certain tone. If they dont respect me, I wont respect them, simple as. Anyway, remember, Im the one whose more mature now. You had said whilst pointing towards your womb area.

That may be true but- I hadnt even halfway finished my sentence before Svetlana had interrupted me yet again.

Yuls is pregnant! Why didnt you tell me that Lena! I wouldnt as been as forgiving otherwise! Svetlana had said, pointing towards you and giving me a fierce look.

Well I didnt deem it neces- I had mostly finished my sentence before I was yet again interrupted.

Hey! Dont point at me that way and then say that sort of thing as if Im some sort of slut! You had shouted back giving Svetlana a glare that would send shivers down anyones spine. However right now, I was more pissed off that I was interrupted twice in a row.

Both of you! Shut up! I hate it when people interrupt me! I had slammed my hands down on the round wooden table to emphasize my point. It definitely shut the two of you up. Svetlana had her arms crossed across her chest and pouted like a five year old would probably do when they were in trouble. And you had slouched in your seat knowing that you shouldnt argue with me at this point in time.

Lena Im sorry, I didnt mean to, I just kind of snapped. You had muttered. But I could tell that you were genuinely sorry by the way you had said it. So I placed my hand onto your shoulder to acknowledge your apology.

Right, now then, as I was going to say to Svetlana I didnt deem it necessary as Yulia had gotten pregnant after we had broken up, and had been with Pasha for quite a while. I had hesitated just before mentioning Pashas name as I didnt know whether I should have said that you had been sleeping with whoever you wanted to. Or to mention your relationship with the bastard. Looking over to you I could see that you had realised my slight hesitation, and why I had hesitated. You gave me a grateful look knowing why I had decided to mention Pasha instead of mentioning Sergey as well.

Oh well that changes things then Sorry Yuls. Obviously she hadnt noticed my hesitation, or if she did, she probably thought that I was reliving painful memories.

Its fine You mumbled back, still slouched in your seat looking down at your fingernails as if they were the most interesting things in the world.

It was silent, and the awkwardness between us was evident. I had quickly reverted into my shy personality as I had noticed people staring at us. Probably from my outburst. You must have realised because you shuffled over so you was sat right beside me and placed my head on your shoulder and entwined our fingers together. With your other hand, you played with strands of my hair humming a song that made me smile. I had closed my eyes as the soothing hums and pleasant stroking of my hair was relaxing me. There was no doubt in my mind that people were staring at us whilst this sort of affection between two girls was happening. But at that time I hadnt a care in the world. I had missed this routine thing with us. More than I would ever admit.

My relaxation lasted a few minutes, my breathing had gone nice and steady and I was on the verge of falling asleep. That is, of course, Svetlana started talking again.

You know I dont mean to interrupt and such but you guys really do suit each other really well. She had said. Which made me open my eyes slowly as not to get blinded by the lights. I could tell that you felt awkward again. Probably because of the fact that you feared I would feel awkward. You had stopped stroking my hair halfway and you werent moving at all. I lifted my head up slowly so your hand wouldnt drag my head back down. I looked towards Svetlana and then over to you. You looked at me and I guessed that you were waiting for me to answer the question. I could see that you wanted to say something, but feared saying the wrong thing.

Yeah We do. I replied, looking at you whilst I had said it. You seemed to relax greatly and gave me a relieved but loving smile and I couldnt help but smile back.

You entwined our fingers again, and instead of bringing my head to your shoulder, you rested yours on mine. I smiled yet again at how this felt. It felt like old times, and even though your hair had grown longer, the layers in your hair made your hair feel like it used to as it pressed up against my shoulder and neck.

So before I interrupted with the whole Neposedi thing which I will talk to you later about Lena Svetlana said whilst giving a look towards me that told me she definitely meant it. What was you saying Yuls? She asked looking over towards you.

You looked towards Svetlana then closed your eyes to think as to what you were going to say next. A few moments passed before you opened your eyes again and smiled, meaning that you remembered what you was going to say.

Well yeah it was going to be something like the supervisors even started to get suspicious. And then, when I was 13 me and Lena kissed for the first time. But an actual kiss, not a greeting kiss. But an actual one. We both agreed though that we would pretend it never happened. You had said. You had only stopped to take a breath but Svetlana still asked a question.

Aww, why did you agree on that? She had asked. Genuine curiosity could be heard in her question. You carried on.

Well, we were in Neposedi, we had to keep certain standards and all that shit. Plus you have to remember the time. Sure it still isnt accepted now. But at least now more people understand that you love who you love and it shouldnt matter what gender they are. But 5, 6 years ago, it was even worse. Plus people were already having suspicions about our sexuality. I couldnt give a shit what someone thought about me, but I knew that Lena did, and still does. You lifted your head from my shoulder to give me a smile which I returned.

Thats true Yulia, but I dont care what people think about who I love anymore. I explained. Which just made you smile even more. You placed your head on my shoulder again and started talking again.

I know Lena. I know. You had said whilst getting into a more comfortable position on my shoulder. Anyway a couple of months had passed and everything was fine. Until the day that I got told I was getting kicked out from Neposedi. You explained. Which gained a shocked expression from Svetlana.

Why!? She asked.

Well I was asked to leave the band , and these are their exact words. For misbehaving and molesting other band members. You had taken a breath again to start speaking again. But yet again Svetlana had began saying something.

Oh my goodness! Youre Yulia Volkova! Svetlana exclaimed. Which actually made me jump. I wasnt expecting an outburst like that. And I didnt know that Svetlana knew about you before me.

Yeah so? You asked, confused at her outburst. A few heads had turned at the outburst. I couldnt help but try and shrink myself out of every ones sight. Although you had entwined your hand with mine once again and turned your head to kiss my shoulder. It definitely helped. I now thought they was looking for our position together and I could care less what they thought. However Svetlana now looked like a crazed fan with a beaming smile looking through her bag that she had with her. She eventually found what she was looking for and pulled out a magazine that on the front page shown the anniversary of Neposedi and the title was The Best Of Neposedi lettered in big, bold red letters. Underneath it in smaller writing it said So Far. And of course, there we all were when we were younger. There you were with your original blonde hair, and sure enough next to you was me. I laughed at the picture realising that I hadnt really changed that much. The only difference that I was able to somewhat tame my mop-head. And behind us with an arm on either of our shoulders was Sergey. He hadnt really changed all that much either when I thought about it. He still had his tan, his black hair and deep chocolate brown eyes. His facial features hadnt really changed all that much. The only thing that was substantially different about him was that he now had muscle definition on his body.

Svetlana pointed to you when you was younger and kept looking up and down. My guess was to try and see any resemblance between the two pictures. After all, you probably were the only one who had changed a lot since then. You nodded your head on my shoulder looking in amusement at the picture.

Yeah, so what? And I cant believe you didnt notice Lena in that picture, if anything shes the person who has only changed a tiny bit since Neposedi. The only thing thats changed is that her hair isnt as big and she gained curves in all the right places.

Svetlana looked at you with an indescribable look, which she then looked at me with. She turned the magazine to face her and scanned the photo. It only took a few short seconds for her to realise that I was indeed in the photo. It was really obvious that you recognised me as you gasped and looked up towards me again.

I cant believe it Im sat here with probably the most famous people that have ever been in Neposedi. And I didnt realise until now. Svetlana said, mostly to herself.

Wait what?? How the fuck are we the most famous? What about the others that actually became famous? We are just people that went to carry on with our lives. You had said. Quite curious about this. I myself could understand why you were. I mean, you had the huge scandal which everyone will be sure to remember in years to come. But how was I managed to become the most famous alongside you was beyond me.

Well like you said. It was the whole molesting thing. I mean who really expected the girl who was molesting people to still have a friend to stick by her side. And the unknown relationship that you two had just added to it. Svetlana explained. Whilst she said it as if it were the most normal thing in the world. I couldnt believe what was being said.

What the fuck Svetlana!? That isnt true! Yulia never molested anybody! It was a whole misunderstanding! I exclaimed. Obviously I defended you. There was no way I was going to let someone talk about you that way.

What do you mean a whole misunderstanding? Svetlana asked. Although I was about to explain my situation. Svetlana had a look across her face that meant that she assumed something without the evidence to back it up.

Oh my goodness! You had sex together didnt you!? Thats the whole misunderstanding! She exclaimed with a smile on her face as she thought that she had figured it all out. However my face was ridden with pure shock. For Svetlana to even suggest that was just atrocious.

No! Lana we didnt have sex until we were 15! You had shouted out loud. You covered your mouth quickly as if that would have reversed what you had just said. Everyone turned to face us again. And for once you were the one that was shy, trying to shrink yourself away from the crowd that was staring at you.

I didnt feel the least bit embarrassed. Why should I? They didnt know who you were talking about. So it wasnt a big deal. I looked at you smiling in amusement as you held the bridge of your nose with your thumb and forefinger as your head was tilted down. I guess you thought that it would make you invisible as you started talking again. Only this time, much more quietly.

Ahem Anyway, the whole thing was something a girl had mistaken for when she overheard us in the toilets. You explained. And even though before I had never seen the issue, I had began to realise how bad it actually sounded.

You know, so far it isnt sounding all that well for you guys. Svetlana stated.

Well it wasnt what it was. Anyway we were in the girls toilets because I was tending to Lenas wound. You explained.

Her wound? Svetlana asked in a sceptical tone.

Yes, my wound Svetlana, I had cut open my knee. She was helping me make it somewhat better. I explained.

Oh, I see carry on then. Svetlana replied. Curiosity written all over her face. You began where you left off and started informing Svetlana of the whole ordeal.

Well, anyway. We were in the bathroom and Lena was sat on the sink top whilst I tended to her leg. Anyway, it was really deep so I had to make sure that I got as much dirt and all that as I could. I had gone and got all the creams and bandages and all the other stuff needed when we had first got there. Anyway, obviously it would be painful. And it was the most I had ever heard Lena swear at that point in my life. You momentarily stopped thinking over what you had just said. A grin had formed on your face and I had started to turn the same shade as my hair. Before Svetlana could say anything though, you started again.

Yeah so by the time this girl had probably gotten to the door things obviously wasnt looking or sounding, too good for us. You explained. Looking towards Svetlana. Your composure now normal as everyone who was previously staring had gone back to there own business.

Well what made it so bad for you both? Svetlana asked. You looked down and then towards me giving me a look asking me did I want her to continue with the story. I nodded my head and looked back towards Svetlana at the same time you did.

I guess it really started sounding bad when Lena was in the most pain. It started with, Fuck Yulia! That hurts! and carried on for quite a while, another was probably the moans that would escape when she didnt want to say something out loud. But I guess it would be when she would say Yulia your actually really good at this. It doesnt hurt when you do it anymore. And I replied with of course Im good at it, Ive done this with a lot of other people. And the fact that when the girl actually opened the door Well considering that Lena was sat on the sink top and I was knelt down didnt exactly help the situation either. You had finally finished explaining the majority of what had happened. And I couldnt be more grateful. No doubt my face was flushed and was probably the same shade, possibly a darker shade, than my hair right now. Listening to it now I understood why people would think what they did. And the fact that I was limping the rest of that day definitely didnt help.

I can see where people would mistake that for what they did. Either way, I am sorry that you got wrongly accused Yuls but what I dont understand is if that was the case, why didnt you also get kicked out Lena? Svetlana faced me and asked me the question.

I was sympathised with because they all thought Yulia molested me I looked down at my hands that were now gripping my legs with anger. Why they didnt believe you back then, I will never understand. You were the most honest person I knew back then.

Thats terrible Im sorry. Svetlana said in a sincere tone. Something that made me smile slightly.

Its okay. Its in the past. I said, hoping to quickly steer away from this topic.

Okay. Svetlana said. Trying to think of something else. Whilst Svetlana was thinking of something to ask, you had noticed my hands and entwined the both of them with your own and placed your head against my shoulder yet again.

Ive got it! You can tell me about when you actually first started dating! Svetlana shouted out loud. Gaining the whole of Starbucks to look towards the two of us and give us disgusted glances.

Oops sorry. I forgot that we were in a public area my bad. Svetlana said whilst giving a sheepish grin and shrugging.

Dont worry about it. Well gladly tell you about it. Its actually a very interesting story. You had said. Making yourself more comfortable on my shoulder.

Well go on then. I want to her all about it. Svetlana replied. Getting comfortable herself with a smile on her face.

Okay, well it all started when

You have no idea how pleased I was when I finished this chapter. I was jumping for joy. Literally. And doing my own little dance Dance It was 8 pages long. Yes I know it doesnt seem that long. But to me it was.
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: 17.08.2009
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: AFE zone :)

: 16, 2011 11:50 am     :

Length of that is just perfect ... I like it Smile
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: 27.03.2011
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: United Kingdom, England

: 16, 2011 3:00 pm     :

():
Length of that is just perfect ... I like it Smile


Thanks Smile I'll try and do it that length more often then.
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16 y/o and cant believe it was so long ago when t.A.T.u first started!!

Check out my new story called Reflections.
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: 27.03.2011
: 41
: United Kingdom, England

: 20, 2011 10:12 pm     :

Well since I currently have writers block for this story. I was thinking of things that would go for the next chapter. And a thought popped into my head. However, it doesnt go with this story at all. So I made a new story.

The story is called Stars So I hope you will give it a read, and I hope you enjoy it Smile
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